Never Fail Kale: How to massage kale 



Yessss the infamous kale.

Kale shot to stardom back in 2014 after what seemed to be an overnight success. Apparently the world loved it so much that the kale farmers couldn’t keep up with the demand and at one stage kale was going to become extinct! But. As many people there are who love love love kale. There seems to be the same amount of peeps who detest it. For most people, it’s just because they’re doing kale all wrong.

I usually use a simple massaged kale in my cooking classes and the last 2 corporate classes I’ve held, most of the class didn’t know what massaged kale was.’What! You give the kale… a massage…’Yes, that’s exactly what you do.

That kale is stressed, so get to work and make those leaves relaxxx so this beautiful plant is enjoyable to eat. Raw kale served as is… no bueno.

We massage to release the kale’s stress and make the leaves relax. This is done with a super simple mix of oil, acid and salt.

Read on for this super simple recipe that you can whip up in a few minutes – it will last for 5-7 days in the fridge. So it’s PERFECT for a Sunday meal prep for the week ahead. 

How to massage kale


  • 1 bunch of curly kale or cavalo nero (tuscan kale)

  • 2 tbsp olive oil

  • 2 tbsp apple cider vinegar

  • Juice and zest of 1 lemon

  • Salt

  • Pepper

  • Optional: dried herbs or chilli flakes or a bit of grated ginger


  1. Rinse kale well in water to remove dirt.

  2. Hold kale stem and rip leaves off the stem. Discard stem, add leaves to bowl.

  3. Add oil, vinegar, lemon, salt, pepper and herbs/chilli.

  4. With clean hands, squash the kale leaves in between your hands for about 2-3 minutes. You’ll start to feel the kale leaves relax and wilt.

  5. Transfer to an airtight container and store in the fridge. Massaged kale will last around 5-7 days, depending on your fridge situation.

Never Fail Kale Salad

Serves 1


  • A good handful of massaged kale (see recipe below)

  • 1/2 cup of cooked beans

  • Half a cucumber

  • Half a zucchini

  • Half a carrot

  • 1/4 cup shaved cabbage

  • 1 corn cob

  • 1/2 tsp coconut oil

  • 1/2 tsp paprika

  • 1/2 garlic clove, grated

  • Salt

  • Pepper

  • 1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil

  • 1 tsp maple syrup

  • Optional: toasted sesame seeds, coconut nut, pan fried egg


  1. Add kale and beans to a bowl.

  2. Use a veggie peeler to slice cucumber into thin strips.Add to bowl.

  3. Use a julienne peeler (or similar, maybe even your awesome knife skills) to thinly slice zucchini and carrot into thin noodles. Add to bowl.

  4. Use a mandolin to thinly slice cabbage into super fine strips. Add to bowl.

  5. Heat a pan on medium/high heat. Add coconut oil.

  6. Use a knife to slice corn kernels off cob. Add kernels to pan.

  7. Cook corn until a few kernels start popping (approx 3 minutes). Add paprika and mix well. Add garlic and mix well.

  8. Reduce heat to medium and let corn cook and char slightly on edges. Add corn to bowl.

  9. Add olive oil and maple syrup to bowl and mix ingredients well.

  10. Add optional toppings.

  11. You could also use this dressing recipe, maybe swap the peanuts for toasted sesame seeds or walnuts or hazelnuts with some ginger. YUM!



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Hey I'm Lou

Hey, I’m Lou

Lover of crispy bacon, homemade popcorn and Mama to BJ.  My mission: to empower you to cook simple meals, so you can nourish your family – even when you’re busy AF because you (and they) are worth it. 

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